Yoshinoya is a gyūdon chain in Japan. Here's a fun copypasta about it.

Reisen's Version With Translator Notes and Comments

  • OMORI - LARGE ORDER
  • TOKUMORI - EXTRA LARGE ORDER
  • TSUYUDAKU - EXTRA SAUCE
  • NEGIDAKU - EXTRA ONIONS
  • TEISHOKU - SET

TONE : THE SPEAKER IS TALKING TO >>1 IN A FRIENDLY AND CASUAL TONE, NOT TRYING TO THREATEN HIM, BUT TRYING TO CREATE A BIT OF RAPPORT TALKING TO SOMEONE UNFAMILIAR.

ANYWAY, >>1, LISTEN TO ME FOR A BIT. IT'S RELATED TO THE THREAD.

I WENT TO THE LOCAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOSHINOYA. (1) YOSHINOYA.

THE PLACE WAS PACKED, SO I COULDN'T SIT DOWN ANYWHERE.

THEN, I TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT THE BANNER HANGING DOWN AND SAW THAT IT HAD "150 YEN DISCOUNT" WRITTEN ON IT.

ARE YOU ALL FOOLS? IDIOTS?

HEY IDIOTS, YOU AREN'T REGULARS OF YOSHINOYA, BUT YOU CAME BECAUSE OF A 150 YEN DISCOUNT. THAT'S REAL FOOLISH OF YOU.

IT'S 150 YEN. ONE HUNDRED FIFTY YEN.

THERE ARE EVEN KIDS WITH THEIR PARENTS HERE. FAMILY OF FOUR AT YOSHINOYA? THAT'S JUST LOVELY. (2)

"ALRIGHT! PAPA'S GOING ORDER A TOKUMORI!", THE FATHER SAID. I CAN'T STAND WATCHING THEM ANYMORE.

YOU FOOLS, I'LL GIVE YOU 150 YEN IF YOU VACATE YOUR SEATS.

YOSHINOYA SHOULD BE A BLOODIER (3) PLACE.

IT ISN'T A STRANGE THING FOR ME AND THE DUDE SITTING ACROSS THOSE U-TYPE TABLES TO GET READY TO START A FIGHT. (4)

STAB SOMEONE OR BE STABBED, THIS ATMOSPHERE IS A GOOD THING.

WOMEN AND CHILDREN SHOULD LEAVE.

FINALLY, WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO SIT DOWN, THE DUDE NEXT TO ME ORDERS A TOKUMORI TSUYUDAKU. I GOT ANGRY AGAIN.

IDIOT, TSUYUDAKU ISN'T POPULAR ANYMORE!

HE ORDERED IT WITH A BOASTFUL EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE. (5)

FOOL, LET ME ASK YOU, DO YOU REALLY WANT TO EAT IT WITH ALL THAT SAUCE? I WANT TO INTERROGATE HIM.

I WANT TO INTERROGATE HIM FOR A GOOD HOUR.

YOU, DID YOU JUST WANT TO SAY JUST "TSUYUDAKU"?

SINCE I'M A REGULAR OF YOSHINOYA, I'M IN A POSITION TO TELL YOU ABOUT THE LATEST CRAZE AMONG REGULARS IS OMORI NEGIDAKU. THIS IS IT. OMORI NEGIDAKU.

THIS IS THE REGULAR'S WAY. AN OMORI NEGIDAKU HAS A LOT OF ONIONS IN IT.

YOU GET MORE ONIONS IN PLACE OF LESS BEEF. THIS IS HOW.

SO GET AN OMORI NEGIDAKU WITH AN EGG. (6) THIS IS THE BEST.

HOWEVER, IT COMES WITH A PRICE.

THE NEXT TIME YOU ORDER IT, THERE IS A CHANCE THAT THE EMPLOYEES WILL MARK YOU UP FOR IT.

IT'S A DOUBLE-EDGED BLADE.

THIS IS NOT RECOMMENDED FOR AMATEURS.

WHICH MEANS, >>1, YOU SHOULD JUST GET USED TO THE BEEF AND SALMON TEISHOKU. (7)

  • (1) - THE POPULAR ENGLISH TRANSLATION LEFT THIS PART OUT, HOW IT'S AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD. THE ORIGINAL AND OTHER ONE LEAVES IT.
  • (2) - SARCASTIC TONE.
  • (3) - A BIT OF CONTEXT HERE. THE SPEAKER WANTED TO IMPLY THAT THE PLACE WAS ALREADY SLIGHTLY BRUTAL. HOWEVER, THE CLASSIC TRANSLATION LEAVES THAT PART OUT.
  • (4) - NOTE THAT HE CAN ALSO BE REFERRING TO REGULARS STARTING FIGHTS, NOT JUST HIMSELF. THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION USES "I". THIS ONE USED "ME".
  • (5) - THE CLASSIC TRANSLATION OMITS THIS.
  • (6) - OMITTED BY THE CLASSIC TRANSLATION.
  • (7) - TRANSLATED AS SET HERE. IF ANYONE BOTHERED TO CHECK YOSHINOYA'S MENU, THE BEEF AND SALMON TEISHOKU IS A REGULAR MENU ITEM THAT COMES IN A SET ALONG WITH SIDES, NOT JUST A SPECIAL.

You can see the beef and salmon teishoku here at Yoshinoya's site: http://www.yoshinoya.com/menu/set/gyushake_tei/